i was trying my best to put into words Everlee’s birth story & i think there are some things that are felt so deeply it is hard to completely share them, but i want God to be glorified for ways He answered prayer through out my pregnancy & her birth. :: so here it goes.
the last week leading up to Everlee’s birth i was crippled so many times by anxiety & fear because the doctors had told me they thought she would do better at this point outside than inside of me(she was measuring very small for her gestational age & they thought that she wasn’t growing anymore & needed to come out sooner than later.) the minute i heard the doctor tell me those word my mind went to the darkest places & i began to be crippled by fear.
my entire pregnancy i have prayed to go into labor on my own & that God would give me the strength to have a natural birth. God even gave me a vision 6 weeks ago of me just clinging to my heavenly father through each & every hard contraction- calling on His name & power. i believed He would answer the desires of my heart & i would be able to experience for the first time going into labor & delivering her drug free (i was induced with both of my boys)
on thursday morning i went to the hospital for a non stress test to make sure that baby girl was doing okay & come to find out my fluid was really low & there were some dips in her heart rate so when the doctor insisted on induction that day my heart broke – i had believed that God would answer my prayers & felt discouraged that i couldn’t let my body do what it needed to do on its own. i got all set to start induction & within 20 mins my water broke all on its own at 4 pm on Thursday—God was starting the process of getting baby girl out!
at this point i started texting my doula, Kym, filling her in on what was going on that i was going into labor naturally & she just kept on encouraging me to make sure i didn’t just stay in bed- to walk around as much as possible & she just kept giving me strength to stick up for what i wanted for my birth! i walked around & ate & just hung out with Justin because i wasn’t having contraction at all even though my water had broke.
but at this point i was still battling fear that she wasn’t healthy & concerned as why she was measuring so small. again my mind was going to dark places & causing a lot of anxiety.
at around 8pm my brother came to the hospital to pray over me & that i would just trust God. so justin, my brother, & one of our good family friends ushered God into that hospital room. their prayers were so powerful & with every tear that came down my face– so did my fears. i felt Gods presence so intensely & there was such a peace in my heart & felt so at ease which i hadn’t felt all day.
around 10pm justin & i fell asleep for a little bit- i still wasn’t having very strong contractions so i figured i should get some rest & then i was woken up around 12:30am with mild contractions so i started bouncing on my birthing ball & working through some of the contractions & progressed to 2cm & at 1am i decided to wake justin up so he could help me through the contractions. this is where Jesus was so evident. it started to get really intense at this point & i had my beats on & was worshiping Jesus through every contraction- praising Him for making my body & allowing me to grow a child & i just had to keep surrendering my pain to Him- my body over to Him. I had been practicing birth affirmations for the last 2 months of pregnancy & was letting my body bring my baby down.
around 2:30 a nurse comes in & says that i need to lay down because they didn’t like what the babies heart rate was doing & says i need to labor in bed– which i knew with the amount of pain i was feeling i couldn’t sit still in bed- there was no way. so i ask her to check me & see how far i had progressed. at this point i am thinking maybe i am at 3-4. she checked me & says oh honey you are at 8cm your baby is going to be here soon! i grab her hand & just start crying!! i can not believe that i am doing it. i am going to have her naturally. God answered my prayers. she is coming & i am doing it!! i have justin call my doula to come to hospital- it all happened so fast!
at 3am i am going though transition & it is so intense. the most intense, natural thing i have ever experienced. i became someone i didn’t even recognized. determined, focused, & just brave. it was so beautiful to feel my body do what it was meant to do- to just give into the process.
at 330am i feel the urge to push & it is intense. i feel her she is right there & i tell the nurse–she is coming out. she needs to come out. & she replies the doctor isn’t here you have to wait. ahhh the most intense 10 mins of my life waiting for the doctor to come in so i could bring my baby girl into this world.
at 345am the doctor walks into the room sits down, i turn over & with one push my baby girl is in my arms. the tiniest, strongest, healthiest little peanut. i felt euphoric. like nothing i have ever felt before. i did it. & i couldn’t believe it! my baby girl was here & her birth was so beautiful & natural. it was everything & more that i could have imagined. i cried & cried. thanking God for what He did. & i looked at my baby girl & she was perfect & beautiful- a gift from heaven at 5lbz 12oz & 18.5 inches she was our tiny little sweetheart.
God answered exceeding & abundantly above every request i made to him that night in labor. i can not even explain in the right words what a deep spiritual experience it was to lean into my savior who made my body & gave me strength & peace to bring a beautiful life into this world. it is like nothing i have ever experienced before. God & his angels were present in my labor room. justin & i could feel His presence through every single contraction.
God is already using my baby girl to draw me into Him & teach me over & over He is a good Father & He loves me dearly & wants me to ask in faith, believing He will answer.